Domineering/Authoritative/Controlling spouses or partners: Is your need to control ruining your relationships?
Wherever there is an authoritative person and a subservant person, the relationship becomes that of a parent and a child. Most often than not, people that are being dominated and controlled have been controlled by someone else before. Just like an abused person who becomes an abuser, they unconsciously also seek to control someone.
CONTROL AND DOMINANCE CAN TAKE ON DIFFERENT FORMS
Control or dominance can take on different forms:
1. Always wanting to be in charge and doing everything on your own because you dont trust your partner's capability - your partner would not do things well enough. "Nobody can do it better than me because no one is as good as I am."
2. Being pushy.
3. Always wanting your way -Your opinion is the only opinion and your partner has to go with it or else...
The controlled spouse/party is partially to blame in this relationship because they allow this controlling behaviour to occur and carry on. They do not want to deal with the consequences of not giving their loved one their way, so they bless everything whether they are happy with it or not.
Why is my spouse so overbearing/controlling?
Your spouse may be overbearing, controlling or domineering for a number of different reasons. Apart from having been a victim themselves, they may be suffering from anxiety, low self esteem and a sense of egotism, which fuel these types of behaviour.
"If I dont do this myself and do it well, the world's going to crush on my feet" or "I wont be accepted if I do not behave this way."
All these are dangerous symptoms of a low or shattered self esteem that can bring the best of marriages to miserable endings.